We’ve been together for over 30 years and man you’ve done well to put up with me. Life was certainly much simpler for you when I was younger and resembled that of a daddy longlegs (thanks Dad). No matter how many crisps I stole from the kitchen cupboard or one penny sweets I bought from the shop, you had my back and helped keep me going through whatever bike ride or climbing adventure I wanted to go on. 

Boobs, you certainly took your time! Thanks for making me the last one in class to progress from a vest to a bra! No amount of tissue or sock stuffing was going to help me and I think even my mum let out a sigh of relief when mother nature decided to make an appearance. School was tough for us both, we soon realised that the bigger your boobs were the more Valentine’s Day cards you received and suddenly food became something we had to think about. I don’t think either of us will forget the first time we equated food to body size or shape. It’s a moment I wish we’d ignored because it has been a rocky road since then. From under-eating to overeating, saving up our calories to binge on pic-a-mix or overdoing it with alcohol. It was a faze we had to go through and I’m so happy we made it out the other side, I’m just sad we couldn’t take everyone else with us. 

I’m sorry its taken me so long to take you as you are. You carry me every day, there is absolutely nothing wrong with us, yet I’ve bullied you for many years and tried to make you become something you’re not. I’m so proud of you for never giving up, whether it’s 100 burpees on a hangover, an unexpected run in the rain, learning to surf, climb, hiking up a mountain in 30 degrees or taking on a ridiculous CrossFit workout, you have my back & accept the bruises, cuts and scrapes. Oh and high five for never breaking anything! 

Butt, who knew you were going to get so big! I’m sorry I wore the wrong sized underwear for most of my life and we’ve certainly fallen over a fair few times but life is so much more comfortable with you around.

Vagina, I’m not sorry for the waxing or the laser hair removal, let’s claim it as payback for all the times you gave me cystitis, you know how much I hate cranberry juice! I’m sorry for the times you had to deal with an unexpected penis and for waking you up in the middle of the night to pee. For squeezing you into lycra and then making you endure those awful spinning bikes! We’ve had such great rides together, both on the bike and off, and we have another big adventure yet to take but I promise to do all the pelvic floor exercises possible, I won’t let you down!  

We’ve dealt with some serious criticism and hate and although some days I’ve wished for a different body I honestly think I’d feel the same no matter who I was. So I’m sorry, it’s really not your fault, we still have our work cut out with brain. Thank you for growing muscles and for letting us become stronger. I never thought we’d feel this powerful and together we’re going to push for more competitions, challenges and of course growing a little us, however, if you could just try and be a little more flexible during yoga I’d really appreciate it! 

I don’t know how far you’re going to take me, or what’s going to happen to us, something I admit I find terrifying, but I promise that whatever we go through we’ll have each other & I’ll do all I can to help us live as happily as we can, for as long as we can.  

I’d love to challenge you to write a letter to your body, even share it with me if you feel like it, It’s so damn therapeutic!